Welp, this is why the site is called “The Two Sides of Me” because guess what?! I’m back in the dumps. Why? No fucking clue. Can I get out of it? What do you think I’m trying to do here?!
I know I’m in control of myself now. I can push myself through these “blah” days and fuck, that feels amazing. Each word I’m typing here is freeing me of that negative mindset, that mindset that I’m not good enough for today. Writing is so damn powerful.
But I’d love to find out why I feel this way so very often. What am I doing the night before to make me wake up in such a slump? Or is it something I’ll just have to deal with the rest of my life? I think it’s that. I think I’ll be dealing with this poo for the rest of my life… but to be honest, I’m OK with that. I know I’m strong enough to push through and if I’m not, I have a support system to back me up. I’m blessed. I’m grateful.
What about you, though? Are you taking a moment each day to check in on yourself to see how you’re really doing? Not your Instagram, not your Twitter, but your real life. How are you actually doing? If your blood pressure spikes reading that question, take a deep breath. You’re not fucked. You’re just aware now. That’s powerful.
I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.