Author: Henry Butterfly

Texas Bound!

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Hi, everybody!

Good news: I’m traveling again! I’m excited this time. I get to meet my new colleagues and get away from all of the mess here where I live. We just had a massive storm and there’s damage and branches everywhere. Can’t wait to get away from it and just act like it didn’t happen (probably should handle it better but heyyo I have a flight to catch in the morning, I need rest).

What’s important today? Management of my time. Calmness. Slowing my brain and heart down. I get anxious when I leave my home. I don’t sleep well elsewhere. It bothers me.

It was important that I worked out today. I am worried about not being able to box. Whenever I’m in a bad mood, boxing gets me out of it. It’s my release, my therapy – similar to writing. Also, will the streak be threatened while I’m away in Texas? WE WILL FIND OUT.

Anyway, I really do hope you’re enjoying your day. Have you taken the time to just sit and breathe? Take in who you are for the day? Do that if you haven’t. Always make sure to check in with yourself.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

My First Deal!

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Hi, everybody.

After two months, I’ve sealed my first contract at my new job (it’s actually a pretty good timeframe to get a deal here)!

I’m pumped! I go into the quarterly business review next week with much more confidence now. It’s a relief. A huge, huge relief.

Things do work out if you keep at it.

I just wanted to share a bit of success with you today. I hope you’re making small steps or leaps and bounds when it comes to successes, too.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Control The Controllable

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Hi, everybody.

I wanted to take this time to shoot you a quick reminder that you can only control what you can control. Everything else? Don’t stress on it.

I had to tell myself this multiple times this week as I work from home and continuously have internet issues that could in end cost me my job. However, it’s out of my control. Instead of freaking out, I am finding solutions. Oh, and I got the two free months of internet out of complaining, HA!

But seriously, don’t stress yourself with things outside of you. It’s not worth it. It’s not healthy. Treat yourself right.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

What’s That? A Quote? Multiple?

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Hi, everybody.

Yep, you guessed it! It’s QUOTE DAY!!!!!!

Let’s do this thing, yeah? I got some good ones for ya today (I think).

We learned the shocking truth that “home” isn’t necessarily a spot on earth. It must be a place you can “feel” at home, which means “free” to us.

Maria von Trapp

When it’s over, I want to say: all my life I was a bride married to amazement. I was the bridegroom, taking the world into my arms.

Mary Oliver

There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it.

Edith Wharton

Today I choose life. Every morning when I wake up I can choose joy, happiness, negativity, pain… To feel the freedom that comes from being able to continue to make mistakes and choices – today I choose to feel life, not to deny my humanity but embrace it.

Kevyn Aucoin

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Me

I Lied

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Hi, everybody!

It’s in the title: I lied. I’m writing to you again after just yesterday telling you I’m done writing for a bit. Oh, boy, how easy do I mess up?

But it’s not a bad thing. I actually had a tremendous day so far and I think the evening is promising.

This goes to show you that it’s important to live in each moment and not think about each possible moment, past or future. Yesterday I felt done with this blog. Today I felt compelled to write to you lot.

I always talk about it: Change is inevitable. It’s going to show up and when it does, be adaptable. You don’t have a choice. Change will always be there, knocking at your front door. Hell, sometimes just skydiving through your ceiling. Be ready for it. I know I’m not all the time but I’m working towards that.

I am aware and I am at ease. Say that a few times… then live the moment you’re in.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Coming to an End

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Hi, everybody.

Don’t worry, this blog isn’t finished! However, I think I need to stop thinking about this streak a bit less (this will be 78 days in a row). It actually drives my anxiety up and with the way I’ve been feeling lately, that’s definitely not needed. Why has this been driving my anxiety up? It’s not the writing itself, but it’s the self-given obligation + not much material to write about. Like today, I don’t have anything for ya really. I played tennis with my Pops earlier, worked out, did a bunch of chores, and I coach later this evening. That’s it. My days are all the same. At least it feels that way. Always in a rush, always looking at the clock.

Want to know what my focus is? I want to make some money. I want to be comfortable enough where I can travel more and just do more. Right now my life is boring. I’m getting to the point where I’m not excited for anything again and it’s fucking scary. My passions are depleting and the repetitive motions are getting to me. What can I change? Myself, a bit. I can be a bit more aware of this feeling and try to combat it with practical ideas, such as doing more work on the weekends so I better set myself up for the week. I don’t know. I’m drowning. I’m 30 and lost. I’m fucking lost.

I’ll still write to you lot, I promise. Maybe not tomorrow but maybe tomorrow, who the hell knows.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Nada

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Happy 4th, everybody!

I have no clue what to do today. It’s not a good one for me. But I wanted to check in with you lot.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Edit: I realize I cannot manufacture happiness today, but I can work on myself to better prepare for moments like this down the road. Happy 4th.

Jam-Packed Day

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Hi, everybody!

Spoiler: Nothing really to write, just wanted to check in and say hi. Hope you’re having a wonderful weekend so far. Also, I’m pretty sure I grossly messed up the title. I don’t know if a hyphen should be there. I really don’t. I’m just winging it, alright?

What are we thinking about today? Lots of things.

  • The girlfriend is in Egypt and she’s homesick and it’s impacting how she’s interacting with me.
  • I have lunch with a couple of friends and then a shit show of a party to go to.
  • I’m really excited for Monday. Why? I get to work on chores and get myself ready for a big week.
  • I’m getting slightly nervous for my trip to Dallas to meet all of my new coworkers.
  • I’m happy I’m writing right now.

I talk about gratitude a lot and I hope it resonates with you as it does with me. Each time I sit down here to write, I’m reminded to be grateful for everything I have in my life, both inside and outside of myself.

We have this one shot, everybody. Let’s use it. And if you don’t want to use it today, that’s just fine. You’ll have more opportunities. I promise.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Fourth of July Weekend!

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Hi, everybody!

Hope you’re doing well today.

I practically started this blog like a work email. Nice.

OK! It’s the weekend, baby. And not just that, it’s the weekend of the 4th! Extra day off. Extra day to… sleep in? Who knows. I don’t have much planned as usual. Nothing tonight outside of boxing training – about to head to the pool right now so I’m writing this blog suuuuper fast.

Tomorrow night will be a shit show. My “drinking buddies” are having a birthday party for our friends. Let’s hope I don’t end up cuddling a toilet, alright? I’m not made up of the same stuff I used to be made up of. I have 2-3 drinks now and fall over. It’s ridiculous, man, RIDICULOUS. But it keeps me from over-drinking, which is nice. Real nice.

Sunday? Well, I don’t know. I’ll figure something out. I’m just happy that my dogs don’t freak out over fireworks and I don’t have too many obligations this year. It should be a relaxing time with a lot of big booms. Let’s do this.

And for those readers of mine that are outside of the US, ENJOY YOURSELF, TOO! Have some fun! Do something stupid, maybe.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Pre-Nap Quick Thoughts

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Hi, everybody.

Yes, I’m a grown ass man that takes naps in the middle of the day. I work from home, alright? Little human interaction, in front of the computer all day–it actually does get tiring. Sometimes it’s nice to shut the eyes for a bit to get a recharge.

But I always take thoughts to bed with me. I don’t know about you lot but I feel like that’s pretty normal. So… what are my thoughts today?

  • I’m worried I’m not driving enough results at work
  • I’m tired (duh)
  • I love my dogs so very much and thank them every day for being my work from home buddies
  • I really want a vacation
  • I’m excited to spar tonight
  • I’m excited to nap right now
  • Do I ever write anything of importance?

That last one digs at me sometimes. I’ve been writing on this blog for… 74 or 75 days straight now. Is it too much? Are you lot tired of reading about my routine, what I’m doing, how I’m feeling, etc.? Do I need to slow it down? Should I shift my focus to larger blog posts?

I DON’T KNOW. This is part of my routine and I very much enjoy doing it. Keeps my head on straight. But I don’t want you lot reading nonsense every day. I appreciate you and want to make sure that when you do click into one of my blogs, you enjoy it. So if you have any ideas, tips, whatever it may be, feel free to comment below.

NAP TIME!

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.