Not Selling, but I Am Helping

Hi, everybody.

I’m not worried about streaks anymore. It’s so freeing, honestly. I thought writing every day was helping me, and it was, but not writing every day is helping me, too. Weird, right?

OK, so what to write about today? WORK! So you lot know I’m in sales if you’ve read 2-3 of my blog posts. If you’ve read any job-related posts over the past month or two, you know I’m struggling.

But I’ve found a loophole to not be attacked by management (even though they somehow love me and the VP said last week, “You are exactly what we need in our sales reps.”). It confused the hell out of me. But the loophole isn’t really a loophole. It’s something I wish I could actually get paid for – helping people. I’ve spent a good amount of my last week training and onboarding new employees along with helping others with their deals. Yes, it doesn’t put money in my bank account but it keeps my job secure and I’m helping people. That’s cool. I enjoy that.

It goes to show that if you are struggling in one area, most likely you’ll exceed expectations in another. Keep that in mind. But I really need a deal to close this week. Cross your fingers for me, please? Thanks.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Tomorrow I Travel

Hi, everybody.

My titles are becoming quite matter-of-fact, aren’t they? It’s true–I am traveling tomorrow. Nothing exciting, just another trip down to Dallas for work. I’ll actually be back on Tuesday evening, so I’m not going to be there for long.

Today was hectic so far. I spent the morning coaching and training per usual, but followed it up with some complicated relationship shit and a bunch of a chores. I can’t decide which one was more tiring: relationship shit or chores. I think it was the stuff involving feelings. I seem to not be very good with those anymore. Was I ever? thinks back

I’m excited to travel because it gets me out of the house and out of my routine but not for too long. I’m ready to get out of the house. It will be nice to work from an office for a day or two I suppose. We’ll see. I mean, you lot know you will hear from me throughout the trip. That’s a given.

Make sure you enjoy the rest of your freakin’ day, OK?

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Writing Out the Nerves

Hi, everybody.

Look, I’m nervous. I have the interview that I’ve been thinking about ALL WEEKEND in just an hour or so. I plan on getting out of this meeting, going for a brief mile run, and taking some deep breaths.

I mean, my hands are already sweating. I don’t usually get nervous for these things.

I wanted to tell someone so I’ve decided to tell you. Voicing nerves and anxiety helps me beat those damn things. I know I’m ready for the interview. I know I’m a fantastic candidate. Now it’s time to truly show that through genuine belief in myself.

My therapist mentioned the “reparent” myself. Now’s the time to do so. Wish me luck! I’ll update you tomorrow.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Update: Success. Moved to the final interview. That mile jog really did the trick for me.

Super Prepared

Hi, everybody.

OK, today’s post won’t be about nothing. Don’t even bother reading yesterday’s post. That was an absolute train wreck. I’m scared to even go back and look myself.

Today is a GREAT day! First I started with some sleeping in – it felt nice. My puppy did not enjoy it AT ALL. I’ve never seen him look more starved (don’t worry, he eats PLENTY). I slept till about 8:30 AM and rolled out of bed, fed the dogs of course, swept, showered, walked the dogs, then I got to do something that’s really, really fun for me. I got to go coach a really cool little six-year old. He’s actually technically sound and has some power, and he’s only six! I talked with his mother today and it looks like she does want him to compete, so we could see the little guy competing in boxing (in a safe manner) as early as eight years old! A pretty fun development this morning.

Then I got my work in. Love getting my work in. Music blasting and head down, slamming the heavy bag after shadow boxing an imaginative opponent for a couple of rounds. I followed that with some battle rope work and medicine ball slams, all capped off with a 3-mile run that felt oh so good.

What a day so far, right? Well, I’m not even to the present yet. I came home and made a killer sandwich. You know how I always talk about “small happinesses”? That’s one of them. I really cherished the shit out of that sandwich today. Oh, and I had some AMAZING red kimchi with it. Mhm, mhm, good.

My dogs are really calm today. Both asleep right now. It’s great because I’m actually nervous for tomorrow. I spoke briefly at a tremendous career opportunity coming up here tomorrow. The second interview. I’m focused and I’ve done my research. Hell, I even have thoughtful questions typed out and ready to go for tomorrow already. I feel good about it.

I don’t want to get ahead of myself, but if I do get this job… well, a lot of my money stressors drop out of my life. And the prospect of that is so freeing. But again, I can’t get ahead of myself. I can’t think I’ve already won. I must stay in the moment, be aware of how I’m feeling and more importantly, how I’m responding, and go from there.

I’ll update you lot as I always do. I really hope you’re having an amazing Sunday and get a great start to the week.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

A Sigh (or Sign) of Relief

Hi, everybody.

Well, I might have finally struck gold. Three members of my team at work left for another company recently and now they’re actively recruiting me. So much so that they’re willing to put interviews on my calendar for next Monday and Tuesday! I mean, we already have the second interview scheduled? They must love my LinkedIn profile quite a bit.

But it really is a huge stress reliever. This company wants to move fast and it’s a 50% pay increase. Also, it’s a job I think I would enjoy much more at a company that’s growing at an immense pace. Also, leadership looks solid across the board.

But I can’t count my chickens before they hatch (that’s the first time I’ve used that expression, I don’t know if I used it correctly) and I must make sure to stay focused on the task at hand: Absolutely crushing the interviews.

Wish me luck. I need a change.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Bored at The Auto Shop

Hi, everybody.

I figured I would write to you since, well, I am capable of doing nothing else at the moment. You see, I came to the auto shop to get an oil change and some work done. Problem: I can’t connect to an unsecured network on my work device. Looks like you lot are stuck with me now.

Today was weird. I woke up at 8:30 AM. I haven’t woken up that late in months (on accident). What happened?

I truly believe my finally said enough is enough, let’s get some rest. What did I say back? Well, mind, how about a 2 mile run to punish you? It worked wonders. I felt great after the run and dismissed the guilt I felt from sleeping in.

But there’s a problem. I need to get some fucking work done ASAP, and it looks like I’m anchored in here at the Nissan shop… just waiting to get internet back. Oh! And I have a web meeting in an hour.

It’s safe to say I didn’t plan this day well. However, who gives a shit? Let’s push through it, eh?

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Understanding Yourself

Hi, everybody.

Do you have a difficult time understanding yourself? I do. Not all the time but, well, a lot of the time.

The funny thing? Most people I know think I’m one of the most confident people they know. The faces we can put on, right? You lot know the real me more than most in real life.

Are we made to understand ourselves? What’s to understand? Both good questions and both extremely difficult to answer. I mean, even when I think about things now, I wonder how I’ll ever “understand” myself or what that even means. But I came into writing this blog thinking it. Now, after the wonderful power of writing struck, I don’t think there is an understanding of ourselves. I mean, we kind of just are what we are, right? No need to understand it.

Again, what the hell did I just write?

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Early Start

Hi, everybody.

Last night was some hell, I’ll tell you that much. Not only did my company pry and pry for end of month closes, they also kept a conversation going till about 11 PM at night trying to pull in any deal possible before September hit. Honestly, I wish I was writing this in October (end of September) because I could make an easy, easy Green Day joke right there.

So yeah, that was stressful. Especially since I haven’t brought in a dime all month–but that happens sometimes, I do believe I will have an outstanding month this month as I’ve built a really, really solid pipeline.

But the stress is still there. I don’t wake up early usually, and definitely not for work purposes, but today I did. Today I made sure to wake up early and start climbing the charts. So far? Yeah, no results. But patience, baby, patience. It also doesn’t help that I worked till midnight last night after some heavy, heavy sparring rounds.

But enough bitching. I’m working from home with my dogs by my side. I have an endless supply of coffee and I have a decent amount of groceries. My bills are paid for the upcoming month. There are a lot of positives–but as you can probably tell, work is weighing heavily on my mind recently.

It will all shake out, right? As long as the work is put in, right? I sure as hell hope so.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Exciting Interview

Hi, everybody.

I don’t know if I’ll get the job, I’m sure there are plenty of candidates much more qualified than me, but I’m excited. Why? Well, I just interviewed with a non-profit for a job that actually pays a decent amount (IN THE NON-PROFIT SPACE!). That’s exciting to me.

For four years I’ve sold for private companies, trying to please ownership. If I do take on this role at this foundation, I will be working to, yes, please ownership, but I’ll be driving at making the world a better place. Kinda cool, huh? Sales isn’t all bad. There’s a lot of good-hearted sales folks out there. You lot just don’t give them the chance.

I’ll keep you lot posted. I’m going to go hit the heavy bags and get some food. Not a bad Monday!

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.