Tag: mental health

My Dog’s Birthday

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody!

Yesterday my dog turned 11 years old. I’ve had her since she was 3 months old. She’s my “ride or die”, and yesterday was fantastic.

First off, we started with a walk. Now, keep in mind I do have a puppy. He’s about 1.5 years old, so he benefited GREATLY from yesterday. Secondly, I made sure to provide a plethora of treats. Dog cookies? Check. Beef tendons? Check. Dental chews so they don’t have terrible breath from the beef tendons? Double check.

But I do get sad seeing my dog age. Like I said, she’s my “ride or die”–really she’s my everything. She’s helped me through so much. Multiple break-ups, multiple spells of extreme depression, moments I thought I’d kill myself, and hell, she even saved a woman who hanged herself at my house. How? Well, I didn’t see my friend’s legs hanging out of the closet, my dog did. She saved that woman. My dog is a damn hero.

Dogs have a special connection to me. When my brother passed when I was young, my parents got me a puppy not as a replacement, but as a new friend. Ever since then, I haven’t been able to live without a dog. They truly are something special. If you’re a cat person, that’s fine, just know dogs are superior in every single possible way. And that’s fact, not opinion.

It was good to see my dog have so much fun yesterday. Today she’s limping because she went a bit too hard at the dog park, but it’s all worth it to her. Plus I have plenty of medication and supplements to help with her pain.

Yesterday was a good day. Seems to be a theme nowadays. I can get used to this.

Happy birthday, my 11-year old badass doggo!

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Another Quote Day

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody.

I’m of course tired. Long day with heavy sparring yesterday and I received the second Pfizer vaccine. The effects of it are hitting me pretty hard today. Again, I don’t care if you’re for or against the vaccine, I’m just telling you today I’m slightly uncomfortable due to nausea and fatigue. No big deal. It will pass.

So yeah, I’m not feeling the best. Sounds like a “quote for a blog” type of day to me, yeah?!

“Joy does not simply happen to us. You have to choose joy and keep choosing it every day.”
– Henri Nouwen, The Inner Voice of Love: A Journey through Anguish to Freedom

Want a second one? OK.

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”
– Rumi

Hey, I provide content at least.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

30 and Fully Vax’d

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody!

My 30th birthday was fantastic. Worked all day but thoroughly enjoy working. I was finally able to make sales calls again and I followed it up with some wonderful boxing coaching and training. You lot probably think that’s all I do. It kinda is. But I love it.

But I have a girlfriend now. So after work we grabbed some Thai food and relaxed. It was a perfect evening. Oh, I also had time to get on vidjie games and absolutely own some noobs.

I’m a nerd. A 30-year old nerd. And I love it.

Today I received my second vaccination (Pfizer gang). Glad to get it, happy to not talk about it the rest of my existence. If you’re an anti-vaxxer, I don’t care. If you’re a pro-vaxxer, I don’t care. You do you. Please and thank you.

Today calls for a nap. Will I get it? Who knows. But I’d love a nap. Other than that, my mind is kind of blank today and it’s… refreshing. I think I’ll log off now.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

I AM THIRTY

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody.

About damn time, right?! I can finally be done writing about turning 30 because, well, I turned 30 today.

What am I doing for my birthday? Sticking to my routine but sprinkling in some fantastic interactions with friends. Gym, work, quick coffee with a friend, work, boxing, coaching, and finish the night with some amazing Thai food. It’s nothing special, but sounds like a perfect day to me.

I am going to buy myself a plane ticket to visit a friend in the Northeast and that’ll be my gift to myself. Other than that, it’s just a normal day. I’m glad I didn’t build this day up – holidays, including birthdays, can be extremely stressful for those suffering from mental health issues. They are for me. But I controlled it this time by being aware. Being aware and at ease.

I’d never even think to be “aware and at ease” when I turned 20, actually I was a drug addict when I turned 20, so I think I’m trending upwards.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Last Day in My Twenties

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody!

Yesterday was fantastic. The idea to have a “treat yo’self” dinner with a couple close friends for my birthday celebration was 100% the correct decision. Queen cut prime rib cooked a perfect medium rare, classic mashed potatoes, unique but delicious green beans, and a salad bar. I mean, I couldn’t ask for much else. Oh, also a nice bottle of Beaujolais, which happens to be my favorite red wine.

It really was perfect. We followed it up with a couple drinks at a bar right next door. The bartender there was… well, she was probably five shots deep by the time we entered the bar. It was an experience, that’s for sure.

Today is my last day in my twenties. Again, surreal. I’ve mentioned that plenty. But I’m excited for today. Why? It’s another day I’m here. Sounds corny but I’m fucking pumped I can say that nowadays. Look at this blog when it first started. I hated myself.

Now I’m starting to love myself again. And I’m heading into a whole new decade of learning, growth, etc., and I couldn’t be more excited about it.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Do What You Want

~ Henry Butterfly ~ 1 Comment

Hi, everybody!

I think I’ve mentioned this in recent posts but if you haven’t read those (shame on you), understand I turn 30 on Monday. I told everyone for the past year this didn’t bother me whatsoever. I thought I was telling the truth. But turning 30 is surreal to me. I know it sounds cliché but I thought I’d be dead by now.

I’m happy I’m not dead. I’m happy I’m turning 30. So I guess it doesn’t “bother” me, it just freaks me out. Doesn’t seem real. Feels like I’m living on borrowed time–but I’ll take it.

Now you may be asking yourself, “Why is this titled Do What You Want if he hasn’t even mentioned it yet. I mean, he’s three line breaks in already. Is he ever going to get to the point?”

I tell you lot all the time: I just sit down and type. I originally wanted to tell you not to freak out about big birthday celebrations due to societal norms, but my mind went other ways. I will get to that point now, though. Umm… don’t freak out about big birthday celebrations due to societal norms. I freaked out for a bit then realized I would rather spend my time with a couple really good friends at a nice steakhouse. So that’s what I’m doing.

Do what you want. Always do what you want… well, unless it’s hurting others. If it isn’t, go for it.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Blogs For Days

~ Henry Butterfly ~ 1 Comment

Hi, everybody.

We’re at Day 33 now. Insane. Never thought we’d get this far on this streak.

To be fair, I’m not writing because of the streak anymore. Sadly I can’t prove that because again I’m waking up with no real thoughts to put to paper, but just thinking this shit out helps me every morning. I guess you could say it’s part of my routine now.

And I’m over 130 blogs now. I’m fuckin’ stoked about that.

It’s my 30th birthday weekend. I might, might not blog this weekend. I really don’t know. I’ve been quiet about it because it’s honestly scary for me to think about (never thought I’d make it this far – seems to be a theme) so I don’t have much planned. That means I should have time to write. But I don’t want to commit. So I’m not going to commit. That’s my birthday present to myself.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Today I Can’t Talk

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody!

BIG study day for me today. Final assessment out of the company boot camp tomorrow morning. Also, today’s a day I like peace and quiet. Along with the pressure for the presentation tomorrow, it happens to be the anniversary of my brother’s death today.

I can get further into detail about all of this stuff at a later date. Today my goals are to keep my head down and study, be there for my parents at the cemetery, and play some damn good sand volleyball. That’s all I got for you today. Heart is racing quite a bit and it’s racing more as a type, so it’s time to sign off devices.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Goal Met

~ Henry Butterfly ~ 1 Comment

Hi, everybody!

Writing from my phone today. You’ll never guess. I’m busy again today.

WordPress does this thing which notifies you when you’re on a blog post streak. I set out a month ago to knock out 30 in 30 days, and just yesterday I was notified from my last post that I did in fact achieve that goal.

So I guess I’m done here. Thanks for reading.

…

…

I’m kidding (you could probably tell). There’s less pressure on me from myself to write now, but I think I’ve built a good habit of making sure I get something down on this site.

I need to come up with a list of topics moving forward. I still just sit down and start typing. Let’s see… what would be good to go over? Let’s try gratitude.

Today I’m grateful for many things: Friendships, family, steady job, boxing (my passion), coaching (having an issue here but still grateful), the food in my fridge, the water in my outdated water cooler, MY DOGS, really so so much. My life is pretty dang cool. So is your life. Please remember that.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Relaxation + Root Canal

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody!

I started my day off with some of the most relaxing activities I’ve done in quite some time. Read a bit, sat with my dogs (they’re the best in the morning), and went to the gym for stretching + whirlpool/hot tub time. My body needed that.

Then I drove home. Well, started to… till I realized I had a root canal scheduled in five minutes. Quickly turned around and headed that way. Root canal wasn’t so bad, honestly, but the rest of my day ties together in a hilarious way.

I’m still in Boot Camp for my work. I’ve mentioned that. But today is a heavy speaking day. We’re supposed to practice our presentations (audibly) and work on our pitches (audibly). I was just asked to go before we were let on break. I tried, but the left side of my mouth isn’t working yet. Luckily she left me off the hook.

Speaking of hooks (wow, amazing what I just did there), I have hard sparring at 7:30 PM tonight. The doctor said I’ll be good to go. But it’s funny after getting some semi-heavy dental work done I’ll just head to the gym less than 12 hours later to get punched directly in the jaw (and probably on the left side because I tend to drop my left hand).

I’m grateful. All of these “problems” aren’t problems. They’re funny circumstances. Six months ago this shit would have stressed me out. Now it makes me laugh. Things change–and what do I always say?

Change is inevitable.

I always say that. That’s the answer. I say “change is inevitable”.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.