Well, shit. Hi, everybody. It’s 4 AM on the dot. I have to work out in about an hour and a half. For some reason, my eyes won’t shut. I’ve done everything under the sun (while not under the sun) and I can’t get tired.
I did just get back from a trip visiting a buddy. I heard some rough news (shouldn’t have been rough) when I was there and I’ve been thinking about it since. But I don’t want to discuss it. I just, I don’t know what to fucking do about my thoughts anymore. I don’t know how to get rid of the depression at times. I have no clue how to battle the shit in me that’s keeping me up right now. I don’t even know what it is.
And sometimes I tell you lot I know what the fuck is going on. Not true. Maybe true. I don’t know anymore. I need sleep. Bad. But soon I’ll be in a pool, swimming. Why? No clue. I’m struggling to figure out my “why” recently, and that’s a big issue for me to have. Whenever that’s occurring, I know something is wrong. But what? What the shit this time?
Hopefully check back in soon. Let’s try to make it through this glorious Monday together, eh?
I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.