Lacking Meditation

Hi, everybody.

So as I mentioned a couple blog posts ago, I’m reading a book titled The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself by Michael A. Singer. It’s been quite a ride so far and hell, I’m not even close to done with the book. It’s one of those books, well at least for me, that I need to put down after reading a chapter or two. It’s some heavy-hitting stuff, I’m telling ya. Also, he does a good job of not bullshitting you. That’s nice to read from a “self-help” type of book.

OK, I’m getting slightly off topic.

The author challenges the reader back into meditation (or for those who currently practice, he further enforces the validity of it). I’ve done a terrible job over the summer meditating. In fact, I think I’ve only done it once or twice over the past four or five months. That’s terrible. But I can change that.

As the author says, “Be the answer, and everything will change.”

That’s some powerful shit. And it’s true. When you ask “Who am I?” there’s no logical response. Singer talks about that. There is no “intellectual answer” as he states. Instead, it’s very simple and clear: “You are the answer.”

So when I talk about making changes in my life, I need to take these words to heart. Meditation is healthy for me and I’ve let it slip away. That’s not anyone’s fault but my own. I owe it to myself to get back into a meditative state from time to time–and I’ll start that tomorrow morning.

I’m excited that I am the answer. Are you excited that you are the answer, too? It’s kind of liberating.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

What’s That? A Quote? Multiple?

Hi, everybody.

Yep, you guessed it! It’s QUOTE DAY!!!!!!

Let’s do this thing, yeah? I got some good ones for ya today (I think).

We learned the shocking truth that “home” isn’t necessarily a spot on earth. It must be a place you can “feel” at home, which means “free” to us.

Maria von Trapp

When it’s over, I want to say: all my life I was a bride married to amazement. I was the bridegroom, taking the world into my arms.

Mary Oliver

There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it.

Edith Wharton

Today I choose life. Every morning when I wake up I can choose joy, happiness, negativity, pain… To feel the freedom that comes from being able to continue to make mistakes and choices – today I choose to feel life, not to deny my humanity but embrace it.

Kevyn Aucoin

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.


Helping People Selflessly

Hi, everybody.

I hope you’re doing well today. I am, even though I happened to fall asleep on the couch last night (usually that messes up my back REAL BAD).

Today’s another good day. Feels like it’s more routine now to wake up in a good mood rather than a bad mood. What do I attribute that to? Well, you lot know I attribute a lot of my mental health successes to this blog, my support system, and remaining aware. However, helping people provides an extra boost to my overall mental health. Why? Well, I finally have the mental capacity to help others without ME in mind. It’s finally getting to the point where it’s selfless help rather than “pat me on the back for helping” help. There’s a difference.

So what’s allowed me to help more freely without keeping myself in the picture? I don’t quite know. That’s what I’m trying to figure out. I think it’s just becoming more and more natural the more I stay aware and the more I practice.

Everyone tells us we can do anything we put our minds to. I don’t believe that one bit, but I like the general sentiment of the statement. And we can do PLENTY that we put our minds to, just not all. Helping others selflessly is one thing I put my mind to and it’s starting to finally come together. Do I still feel good when I help people? Yes, but I’m trying to eliminate the self from helping others, so that needs to change.

I don’t know if I confused you here. I hope I didn’t. If you have questions, please feel free to comment below. I love chatting with you lot!

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Last Week of Boot Camp

Hi, everybody.

Big exhale.

It’s the last week of Boot Camp for my work. That’s all I have to type today. We’re almost there, baby! FREE AT LAST, FREE AT LAST (in a week). I guess I did start the morning off well with a workout and a dog walk. That was nice.

Oh, don’t worry. I’ll write a long blog post to finish off this 30-day sprint. This is laziness but I promise you I have a very busy day.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Giving Myself A Break

Hi, everybody!

Don’t worry, I’m not really taking a break. I’m just not going to write anything today. Today will be a “quote/excerpt of the day” type of day. Not happy about it? Deal with it. Or maybe the quote/excerpt will help you deal with it.

Man Is Not Our Enemy
By Thich Nhat Hanh
“The roots of discrimination, conflict, and war are not to be found outside us. They are within our own way of thinking and looking at the world. The real enemy is our ignorance, our attachment to views, and our wrong perceptions. With looking deeply and the practice of compassionate dialogue, we can transform misperceptions and anger into understanding and love, just as a gardener can transform compost to grow beautiful flowers and vegetables.”

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Peace and Quiet

Hi, everybody.

It’s pleasant inside and outside my home today. Same with my mind. Right now I’m lying in bed with one of my dogs and a friend (no, we aren’t doing anything like that). I finished boxing training this morning along with mowing. Oh, had the chance to pick up Dunkin’, too, and everybody knows America Runs on Dunkin™.

Sorry for that.

It is peaceful today. I’m about to head out to a wine festival in midtown. 400 wines to sample, plenty of food vendors, and a wonderful sunny sky. Calm winds, low 70s, and … why am I sitting in front of this computer?

Oh yeah, I love writing. This is peaceful and quiet, too. This gives me balance during a hectic week, a hectic weekend, a hectic life. I am loving lots of life right now, though. Feels good. Don’t get me wrong, still battling my demons, but I think I’m finally breaking through. And if I’m not, I have you lot to fall back on, right? I can trust you. More importantly, I can trust myself now.

Thank you for your help in finding me some peace and quiet. You’ll get there soon. Hell, I hope you’re already there. I really do.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Back Where It Started

Hi, everybody!

I hope you’re all doing so, so great today. Each day is bringing something new for me right now and boy does it feel good.

Yesterday I was quite busy. Crazy, right? Never happens. Anyway, I had my normal work schedule but had to follow it with legitimate sparring rounds and sand volleyball. You could say my body is quite tired, but it’s not limiting me. I enjoy being sore. I enjoy being tired at times. I enjoy having the feeling of “I am doing shit”. It’s an empowering feeling, especially when “doing shit” means jabbing someone in the face and torso for 3 minutes straight.

Do you lot know I’m on a 26-day streak with blogs? I can’t stress enough how instrumental writing is in maintaining my mental health. Remember, this thing started off as a mental health blog. I still think it is, but I’m not having as many struggles right now. It’s a good feeling but I do know things will change and I’ll relapse back into that negative state. However, this time I’m confident I’ll be able to navigate away from it quicker than ever. I’m happy about that. Very happy about that. My apologies if the change in this blog deters you from reading any further, but if it does, you’re kind of a butthead. I mean, think about it. You want me to be sad? C’mon, this is a good thing!

I guess I should tie in the title, eh? Forgot to do that. “Back Where It Started” alludes to me sparring at my first ever boxing gym I trained at. That’s literally it. I am not creative with titles. You know this by now.

I’m trying to figure out my next step with this blog. I’d like to do more. I don’t know if I have the necessary time to do more, but I would like to do more to help those struggling with mental health. If I could do it through boxing 100% of the time, my life would be complete. However, things don’t just fall into place like that.

If you have an idea of where you’d like to see this blog go (I can write about almost anything), please let me know. If you’d like more stories of my life, let me know. If you’d like more self care BS or book quotes, let me know. I’m open to it. I love my readers. You lot save my life each and every day. Thank you.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.