Tag: change

Pushing On

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody!

Hope your morning is off to a great start. Mine is, now I await my 9 AM “Boot Camp” for my new job. Not pumped. It’s very repetitive.

I did have a slight meltdown yesterday. I had some issues with my mental health provider and their front desk. No, I wasn’t being a Karen, I promise. But I wasn’t happy. I almost fired my Psych & Therapist, but luckily they somewhat talked me out of it.

But this goes to show you that no matter how great you’re feeling, that lil’ bastard in the shape of depression, anxiety, or both can appear any time they feel it’s necessary.

Yes, I know we do have control. But I don’t believe we do all the time.

I fought through. Talked to the right people in my support system. Made sure to take care of myself through the sport of Boxing. Hell, I even got headshots done in the evening.

I pushed on, through, whatever you want to call it. I was aware and not at ease — now I’m aware and at ease. It’s a nice feeling. But more growth is necessary. And inevitable.

Push on, people.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Work “Boot Camp”

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody!

That exclamation mark is deceiving. I’m actually not excited whatsoever. It’s CULTURE time at the new company, meaning I have a two-week orientation starting today. And I’m not excited. I’ll probably tell you how unexcited I am about 50 times throughout this blog, if it lasts that long.

OK, but really, I’m not excited AT ALL. But I do like this company quite a bit, so I guess I’ll suck it up and push forward. Sometimes we have to do shitty shit in life to get to where we want to go. We all need to accept that. Your Instagram feed isn’t realistic, so don’t think that’s what life is supposed to be like. Life still comes with many ups and downs, lulls, and voids. Usually more of the latter than the former for most of us.

But stick in there. If you are about to embark on a two-week mission of misery, identify it. Then find a way to dominate it.

OPE! First “meeting” starts in five minutes. Gotta go.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Half Day By Surprise

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody!

I woke up this morning with three extremely painful fingers, a weak right wrist, lower back pain, and immense shoulder tightness. Wasn’t thrilled. Age is a factor when it comes to training, also my recovery sessions aren’t nearly good enough.

Well, I’ve told you lot before sometimes things just happen for us. I thought today I would have to sit in front of this computer and just sit in this slightly uncomfortable pain all day, but my boss messaged me early this morning.

“Have a good weekend?”

Easily, yes. I did have a great weekend. Not even a question.

He followed with, “Boot camp starts tomorrow, how about you take a half day today?”

Easily, yes. My body thanks you.

Now I get it, this is pure coincidence. “This won’t happen for me.” I can hear you yelling back at me already.

But I bet it does happen for you. Maybe not in this exact way, but the world isn’t out to get you. You might be out to get yourself, but no, the world isn’t out to get you. People might be, but you have the power to change who you surround yourself with, what you surround yourself with, and putting yourself in the right circumstances for good things to happen for you.

That’s what I’ve spent the last six months doing. Putting myself in better places, better circumstances so good things do happen. I couldn’t keep getting stepped on. I couldn’t get kicked anymore. I had to fight back and I had to make changes. I’m happy I did. I’m happy I realized I do have enough strength to beat my depression and anxiety, even if it’s just for a few moments a day.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Morning Mind

~ Henry Butterfly ~ 1 Comment

Hi, everybody.

You can tell I’m running out of topics. I think I’ve titled something like this before, but honestly can’t remember. Also, don’t feel like doing a quick search. Deal with it. However, it does look like I need to sit down and write down a list of possible future topics. For now, deal with it.

Morning thoughts aren’t like shower thoughts. Not crazy. Not profound in any certain way. Just thoughts. Usually lackluster thoughts but clear thoughts. At least that’s what mine are in the morning. More of a problem-finding type of deal than a problem-solving type of deal.

Does that make sense? Maybe? OK, good enough.

I can’t decide if I should truly take a day off from training, but I think my sore body will help my mind out with that decision.

I have a woman over that’s really nice but I would like some alone time today.

I overbooked myself again. Tonight will be a shitshow.

I’m tired. I wouldn’t mind if my morning thoughts rolled back into/under a blanket.

I love watching my dogs play in the morning. I think I’ll end with this, especially since I stopped writing to take some photos and videos. I completely lost my train of thought, and maybe that’s a good thing.

Let’s just enjoy this day. Enough thinking.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Busy Boxing Day = Quick Blog

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody!

Just got done getting my face and liver hit. Great way to start your day (honestly). Pro tip: Always best to hit your opponent more than he hits you. Today that went in my favor.

I need to hop in the shower. It’s time to go coach the two children classes I teach on Sunday mornings, followed by training my Pops, bringing in my boxers to spar each other, then finish off with some sand volleyball.

It’s a busy, lovely day. Weather is great, too. I don’t really have too much on my mind, honestly. I feel like this week, since I’ve written so much, I’ve been able to flesh out so much for myself.

I’ve told you to try writing, haven’t I? Most of the time I’m writing here, I’m asking myself a question. About halfway through, maybe sometimes a bit longer, I have an answer to that question. That’s what writing does for me. It also slows me down. I write so damn fast that everything around me slows down. My day seems to slow down, too. Writing is medicine for me. I hope you can find something as healing for you along this journey, too. I’m still here with you.

Welp, time to get back to it.

Oh, that’s the 7-day streak, baby. Fuck yeah.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Staying Your Course

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody!

Another reminder popped up to write a blog, so here I am. I’m not a huge fan of Siri but I do love me some reminders. I’d be lost without them.

WHAT A TRANSITION. Today we’re discussing staying our course. I’ve stumbled and tripped along the road most of my life but I’ve been lucky enough to keep a general sense of direction since I beat my drug addiction a decade back.

What’s the key to staying on your path? I don’t think there’s just one. But I do believe the few things I list below are essential to keeping your life “on track”, at least for me:

  • Keeping a routine – It doesn’t have to be followed step-by-step every day, but it is important to have a general idea of what you’re doing each day.
  • Checking in with your friends and support system.
  • Taking a day for yourself to do nothing – Self care is very important and sometimes we just need a recharge to find our center again.
  • Understand what excites you, tangible or intangible, and make sure you’re putting time towards that.
  • Reading – I don’t do this enough but whenever I do, I feel like I’m on the right path.
  • Getting outside – Whether it’s to walk your dogs or just to chill, it’s important to get outside and get fresh air, deep breaths, and sunlight.
  • Exercise – No matter what you end up doing, being active and getting some form of exercise in can be extremely influential in keeping your body and mind strong.
  • Meditations – These don’t have to be structured, and no, you don’t have to get to a state of nirvana to have a successful meditation session, you just need to be present.
  • Mental check-ins – Are you doing well? Are you taking on too much? I don’t ask these questions enough of myself. I hope you do.
  • Diet – I struggle with this the most, but what we put in our body directly impacts our day. Remember that. I wish I remembered it a bit more often, especially last night when I had four waffles right before bed.
  • Trust yourself.

This could all be bullshit to you, but I hope you’re able to grab one to two things out of this list that you can apply to your daily schedule. I know all this shit helps me. Maybe it’ll help you, too. I think that’s what this blog is for, kinda?

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Change Will Happen

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody!

Currently I am listening to Chorus calls. What are Chorus calls? Recorded sales calls at my new company. I’m “shadowing” for two weeks and I’ll be doing this a lot over the next two weeks. I enjoy it–it’s nice to hear other people’s sales tactics and such.

Outside of that, I’m drinking some coffee and thinking about change. We have the obvious one, the new job, but there’s a few other things I’m looking to change this week.

I spoke with my head coach yesterday about the stresses of handling so many boxers. Yesterday I had eight boxers in a very small space and I tried to work with them all. By the end of it, I was just frustrated. I never want to feel beat up, defeated, etc. in coaching. That’s not what this should feel like. So I had to take a look at what I was doing. And I was doing too much, according to my head coach. He’s right. It’s time to cut back and make sure I’m taking care of myself.

Also, my coach said we will try for a professional fight. One more fight for me. Let’s see if he follows through–I’ve been training my ass off and I’m picking it up every single day.

And now we’re back to the new job. A big change. I feel good about it, though. I really like the people. I still really like my life, even with constant inevitable change.

We’ve talked about it before. Change will happen. Stick with it, people.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

New Job, Quick Post

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody!

I start the new gig today! Very excited. I wanted to write something out real quick before my first meeting starts (in nine minutes, dun dun dun).

I am excited for this challenged. Scared, but mostly excited. Let’s hope my dogs somewhat cooperate with me on my first day. The puppy is already asking for 20 things… let’s hope the new boss really loves dogs.

Welp, here goes nothing.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Starting Fast, Starting Strong

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody!

Hope you lot are doing well. Today is a great day, it really is. Let’s go over the agenda.

  • Boxing Technique and Conditioning (Complete)
  • An All Out American Breakfast (In Progress)
  • Hiking
  • Dogs
  • Lady Friend
  • More Food
  • Probably Vidjie Games

It’s really a fantastic day. And it’s going to stay that way all the way through. I can’t state how important the start of your day is, truly. Every single day I start with my passion (boxing) turns out to be an amazing day. I barely boxed today, just mainly coached, but boy starting with that passion really sets you up for a successful day, whatever that means for you.

Think about that. See if you can work in more of what you love doing earlier on in the day. I like to call it starting strong or starting fast. I use the term often in boxing. Think about it: The way you start translates into the rest of what you do throughout the day. If you start with something destructive, do you think you’ll end with something constructive? If you start your day slow, do you really think you’ll be able to pick it up by the end of the day?

But it’s not easy. I fail a lot. But I know what gets me that happiness now. I know that coaching, boxing, conditioning, interacting with people on a teaching level gets me going. Sets me up for success. Try to figure out what that is for you. Everyone has something. Everyone.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Overextension

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody!

Hope everyone is doing great today. I am. Had six fantastic sparring rounds with an old boxing mate from years back. He’s a bit heavier but still quick with his hands.

Let’s talk about today’s topic: Overextension. What do I mean by that? Well, if you look at my life, you’ll see it as a glaringly obvious weakness of mine. The amount I double-book myself is unreal. The amount of times “yes” comes out of my mouth is far too many.

My very best friend told me that givers will always give and takers will always take, so if you’re a giver, make sure to learn to say no. I’m working on that now. Hopefully writing it into existence helps that effort.

Learn to say no, even if you think you do have the time. Sometimes you need to recharge. I know I do.

But I have to train the boxers tomorrow and go on a hike. So… maybe start this whole “me time” thing next week?

We’ll see.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.