Author: Henry Butterfly

Do What You Want

~ Henry Butterfly ~ 1 Comment

Hi, everybody!

I think I’ve mentioned this in recent posts but if you haven’t read those (shame on you), understand I turn 30 on Monday. I told everyone for the past year this didn’t bother me whatsoever. I thought I was telling the truth. But turning 30 is surreal to me. I know it sounds cliché but I thought I’d be dead by now.

I’m happy I’m not dead. I’m happy I’m turning 30. So I guess it doesn’t “bother” me, it just freaks me out. Doesn’t seem real. Feels like I’m living on borrowed time–but I’ll take it.

Now you may be asking yourself, “Why is this titled Do What You Want if he hasn’t even mentioned it yet. I mean, he’s three line breaks in already. Is he ever going to get to the point?”

I tell you lot all the time: I just sit down and type. I originally wanted to tell you not to freak out about big birthday celebrations due to societal norms, but my mind went other ways. I will get to that point now, though. Umm… don’t freak out about big birthday celebrations due to societal norms. I freaked out for a bit then realized I would rather spend my time with a couple really good friends at a nice steakhouse. So that’s what I’m doing.

Do what you want. Always do what you want… well, unless it’s hurting others. If it isn’t, go for it.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Blogs For Days

~ Henry Butterfly ~ 1 Comment

Hi, everybody.

We’re at Day 33 now. Insane. Never thought we’d get this far on this streak.

To be fair, I’m not writing because of the streak anymore. Sadly I can’t prove that because again I’m waking up with no real thoughts to put to paper, but just thinking this shit out helps me every morning. I guess you could say it’s part of my routine now.

And I’m over 130 blogs now. I’m fuckin’ stoked about that.

It’s my 30th birthday weekend. I might, might not blog this weekend. I really don’t know. I’ve been quiet about it because it’s honestly scary for me to think about (never thought I’d make it this far – seems to be a theme) so I don’t have much planned. That means I should have time to write. But I don’t want to commit. So I’m not going to commit. That’s my birthday present to myself.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Today I Can’t Talk

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody!

BIG study day for me today. Final assessment out of the company boot camp tomorrow morning. Also, today’s a day I like peace and quiet. Along with the pressure for the presentation tomorrow, it happens to be the anniversary of my brother’s death today.

I can get further into detail about all of this stuff at a later date. Today my goals are to keep my head down and study, be there for my parents at the cemetery, and play some damn good sand volleyball. That’s all I got for you today. Heart is racing quite a bit and it’s racing more as a type, so it’s time to sign off devices.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Goal Met

~ Henry Butterfly ~ 1 Comment

Hi, everybody!

Writing from my phone today. You’ll never guess. I’m busy again today.

WordPress does this thing which notifies you when you’re on a blog post streak. I set out a month ago to knock out 30 in 30 days, and just yesterday I was notified from my last post that I did in fact achieve that goal.

So I guess I’m done here. Thanks for reading.

…

…

I’m kidding (you could probably tell). There’s less pressure on me from myself to write now, but I think I’ve built a good habit of making sure I get something down on this site.

I need to come up with a list of topics moving forward. I still just sit down and start typing. Let’s see… what would be good to go over? Let’s try gratitude.

Today I’m grateful for many things: Friendships, family, steady job, boxing (my passion), coaching (having an issue here but still grateful), the food in my fridge, the water in my outdated water cooler, MY DOGS, really so so much. My life is pretty dang cool. So is your life. Please remember that.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Relaxation + Root Canal

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody!

I started my day off with some of the most relaxing activities I’ve done in quite some time. Read a bit, sat with my dogs (they’re the best in the morning), and went to the gym for stretching + whirlpool/hot tub time. My body needed that.

Then I drove home. Well, started to… till I realized I had a root canal scheduled in five minutes. Quickly turned around and headed that way. Root canal wasn’t so bad, honestly, but the rest of my day ties together in a hilarious way.

I’m still in Boot Camp for my work. I’ve mentioned that. But today is a heavy speaking day. We’re supposed to practice our presentations (audibly) and work on our pitches (audibly). I was just asked to go before we were let on break. I tried, but the left side of my mouth isn’t working yet. Luckily she left me off the hook.

Speaking of hooks (wow, amazing what I just did there), I have hard sparring at 7:30 PM tonight. The doctor said I’ll be good to go. But it’s funny after getting some semi-heavy dental work done I’ll just head to the gym less than 12 hours later to get punched directly in the jaw (and probably on the left side because I tend to drop my left hand).

I’m grateful. All of these “problems” aren’t problems. They’re funny circumstances. Six months ago this shit would have stressed me out. Now it makes me laugh. Things change–and what do I always say?

Change is inevitable.

I always say that. That’s the answer. I say “change is inevitable”.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Last Week of Boot Camp

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody.

Big exhale.

It’s the last week of Boot Camp for my work. That’s all I have to type today. We’re almost there, baby! FREE AT LAST, FREE AT LAST (in a week). I guess I did start the morning off well with a workout and a dog walk. That was nice.

Oh, don’t worry. I’ll write a long blog post to finish off this 30-day sprint. This is laziness but I promise you I have a very busy day.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Giving Myself A Break

~ Henry Butterfly ~ 2 Comments

Hi, everybody!

Don’t worry, I’m not really taking a break. I’m just not going to write anything today. Today will be a “quote/excerpt of the day” type of day. Not happy about it? Deal with it. Or maybe the quote/excerpt will help you deal with it.

Man Is Not Our Enemy
By Thich Nhat Hanh
“The roots of discrimination, conflict, and war are not to be found outside us. They are within our own way of thinking and looking at the world. The real enemy is our ignorance, our attachment to views, and our wrong perceptions. With looking deeply and the practice of compassionate dialogue, we can transform misperceptions and anger into understanding and love, just as a gardener can transform compost to grow beautiful flowers and vegetables.”

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Peace and Quiet

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody.

It’s pleasant inside and outside my home today. Same with my mind. Right now I’m lying in bed with one of my dogs and a friend (no, we aren’t doing anything like that). I finished boxing training this morning along with mowing. Oh, had the chance to pick up Dunkin’, too, and everybody knows America Runs on Dunkin™.

Sorry for that.

It is peaceful today. I’m about to head out to a wine festival in midtown. 400 wines to sample, plenty of food vendors, and a wonderful sunny sky. Calm winds, low 70s, and … why am I sitting in front of this computer?

Oh yeah, I love writing. This is peaceful and quiet, too. This gives me balance during a hectic week, a hectic weekend, a hectic life. I am loving lots of life right now, though. Feels good. Don’t get me wrong, still battling my demons, but I think I’m finally breaking through. And if I’m not, I have you lot to fall back on, right? I can trust you. More importantly, I can trust myself now.

Thank you for your help in finding me some peace and quiet. You’ll get there soon. Hell, I hope you’re already there. I really do.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Back Where It Started

~ Henry Butterfly ~ 1 Comment

Hi, everybody!

I hope you’re all doing so, so great today. Each day is bringing something new for me right now and boy does it feel good.

Yesterday I was quite busy. Crazy, right? Never happens. Anyway, I had my normal work schedule but had to follow it with legitimate sparring rounds and sand volleyball. You could say my body is quite tired, but it’s not limiting me. I enjoy being sore. I enjoy being tired at times. I enjoy having the feeling of “I am doing shit”. It’s an empowering feeling, especially when “doing shit” means jabbing someone in the face and torso for 3 minutes straight.

Do you lot know I’m on a 26-day streak with blogs? I can’t stress enough how instrumental writing is in maintaining my mental health. Remember, this thing started off as a mental health blog. I still think it is, but I’m not having as many struggles right now. It’s a good feeling but I do know things will change and I’ll relapse back into that negative state. However, this time I’m confident I’ll be able to navigate away from it quicker than ever. I’m happy about that. Very happy about that. My apologies if the change in this blog deters you from reading any further, but if it does, you’re kind of a butthead. I mean, think about it. You want me to be sad? C’mon, this is a good thing!

I guess I should tie in the title, eh? Forgot to do that. “Back Where It Started” alludes to me sparring at my first ever boxing gym I trained at. That’s literally it. I am not creative with titles. You know this by now.

I’m trying to figure out my next step with this blog. I’d like to do more. I don’t know if I have the necessary time to do more, but I would like to do more to help those struggling with mental health. If I could do it through boxing 100% of the time, my life would be complete. However, things don’t just fall into place like that.

If you have an idea of where you’d like to see this blog go (I can write about almost anything), please let me know. If you’d like more stories of my life, let me know. If you’d like more self care BS or book quotes, let me know. I’m open to it. I love my readers. You lot save my life each and every day. Thank you.

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.

Bloated

~ Henry Butterfly ~ Leave a comment

Hi, everybody!

The title is simple and the subject matter is simple: I’m bloated, physically. Mentally I feel pretty solid. The gym helps with that. My physical health helps with that. My friendships and family relationships help with that.

But today is just a fun blog. I shovel-fed food into my mouth last night after training. Granted, I did train twice yesterday, but I shouldn’t have put so much food down my gullet. What did I eat? From 8 PM to 12 AM, I had: Shrimp pad thai, a pork chop (thick one), crackers and hummus (lots), a roast beef and fake gouda cheese sandwich, half a sleeve of salt and vinegar veggie chips, and I topped it all off with a giant bowl of Blueberry Chex.

I’m a pig, I get it.

So, yeah, I’m bloated. And I don’t have much else to say today. Sorry. Well, not really. I can’t always have something to say, right? Oh, I spar later this evening. Hopefully this bloat depletes over the next few hours.

Why did I just tell a bunch of strangers I’m bloated?

I wish you well. Try not to beat the shit out of yourself.